The world and the professionals tell us of the many dangers for children who are raised in dysfunctional homes, but the truth is that no home is perfect. Simply because our homes are made up of us and we are all flawed people. My conundrum was remaining fully committed to my husband meanwhile doing what was best for my children, here was how God helped me to trust Him with my children in a less than ideal situation.
WELL MEANING ACCUSATION
On one occasion a relative and close friend, whom I love dearly until today, confronted me about my children. He had been trained in some psychology and had determined that my home was too dysfunctional to raise healthy children. I had been advised many times in the past to file for divorce for various reasons, but this time it was particularly persuasive because it focused on my four children.
The accusation was that I was being a bad mother subjecting my children to the negative influences produced by a difficult marriage. He said that I may have had the faith to endure my situation, but that the children did not have sufficient faith and were therefore being destroyed. He quoted statistics of horrifying outcomes of children from dysfunctional homes. My friend was very convincing in his argument and I knew he spoke from a place of loving concern.
I listened prayerfully, believing that God must have taken the children into account when He instructed me to stay and love my husband. I could not wait to get alone so that I could pray and reexamine the convictions I had in light of the concerns of my friend.
HEAVENLY WISDOM
As soon as I got alone in my car, I opened my mouth to pray, but before I could get one word out, I heard clearly in my spirit, “I raised Moses in Pharaoh’s house.”
That one timely, powerful and wise truth breathed into my spirit demolished every contradicting argument. It became very clear to me that God does take care of all the details when He leads and guides us through life; even details such as our children’s best interests.
MOSES AND HIS MOTHER
Moses was born in Egypt at the time when the Hebrews were slaves. The Pharaoh determined that the Hebrews were becoming too numerous and powerful so he implemented a decree for the killing of all boy babies. Moses’ mother defied the edict and hid her baby boy in a basket and floated it down the river where he was rescued by the Pharaoh’s daughter. Then as the story goes, Moses’ sister who was watching the basket, suggested that she knew a woman who could nurse the infant, that woman was Moses’ real mother (Exodus 2).
Nothing in Moses’ young life was ideal; he was born into slavery at a time of a baby massacre, he was put into the precarious situation of being in the basket on a river and then rescued by the most powerful ungodly family at
that time. An important redeeming element of this story was that Moses had his godly mother in his young life. God was never handicapped by the negative circumstances surrounding Moses, but He was able to raise Moses to be a great deliverer for his people.
Throughout the bible, God takes pleasure in doing great things in the midst of impossible situations. Like when He chose Abraham and promised him that his 90-year-old barren wife would bring forth nations. Nothing is beyond God’s ability; we just need to learn what is His will in our circumstances. Those that are led by His Spirit are his children (Romans 8:14).
TODAY, MANY YEARS LATER
I can only say that the fears of my friend about 23 years ago were never realized. My four children made it to adulthood without incident and were all successful in completing University degrees. All are married in good and stable homes and I have four wonderful grandchildren with one more soon to arrive. Best of all, my children are decent and trustworthy people who work hard are committed for us to be a loving family. My children have also become very protective of me and show their loving care in their own unique ways.
My children are very far from perfect and they still keep me on my knees; but when I look at their lives, I see only the kindness and faithfulness of God.
STATISTICS OF FAITH
God lavished me with His perspective and wisdom as I tried to make decisions as a mother. After hearing His word, it took only one moment for my heart to go from confusion and fear to a mind-blowing peace. What were the statistics an old woman bringing forth nations from a barren womb? What were the statistics of a sea parting to bring forth deliverance of God’s People, but then that same sea closing to destroy the enemy? What are the statistics of Lazarus being raised from the dead? What are the statistics of Jesus raising on the third day?
As God’s people, I pray that we will strive to know God’s wisdom and will above the flow of the current world culture. We who have been justified by Jesus Christ should look to walk by faith in Him and not by the world that does not know him nor understand His ways.
I pray that my testimony and experience will encourage your faith and trust in God with the details of your life. It is common for God to take us into seemingly impossible predicaments and situations that are beyond our control, so as to make sure that we will know that our deliverance was by His power and not our own.
